JJ Abrams breaks several cameras when he attempts lens flare effect with lightsabers, delaying production
“Bad Robot” revealed as son of Gonk and EV-9D9
Half of Episode 7 to be dedicated to reboot of Episodes 1, 2 and 3 via character flashbacks
Wookiee musical scene!
Mark Hamill to cameo as villain, Cocknocker
Third Death Star to make appearance, looking like a Borg Cube
Jar Jar Binks re-cast as mysterious bounty hunter who looks like Terry O’Quinn
Stromtroopers now highly-proficient snipers incapable of missing a single shot
Screenplay by Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman to be re-written one day prior to filming by George Lucas in order to ruin everything
“Half of Episode 7 to be dedicated to reboot of Episodes 1, 2 and 3 via character flashbacks”
Sh*t Wookiees Say
Okay, nothing could possibly top this. Over. Out. Done.